Gwen Magazine

I was having a discussion with a client the other day regarding temper tantrums and realized a common roadblock … audience participation. How can a parent handle this challenging situation if everyone is watching and judging him/her? More so for first-time parents. I wish that when a child is having a tantrum in public people will just learn to ignore it. When a child is having a “fit” it doesn’t matter what kind of attention they get as long as they get it. Therefore, people simply need to stop feeding into the tantrum. Don’t stare… don’t say anything. When you give your attention to the child having a tantrum you are feeding fuel to the fire which in turn makes it even harder for the parent to put it out. Even though it gets tempting to take over, especially when the parent clearly cannot handle the child, you just can’t! As for the parent who is faced with this situation, the first thing you have to remember is to stay calm. Don’t raise your voice. I’m assuming that at this point it’s too late to talk to the child since he/she is already into the tantrum. In that case, remove the child from the audience if possible. That child is extremely frustrated and needs to release his/her emotions. Remember, they are unable to verbalize their feelings and can only vent through tantrums. Some ways to isolate them is to take them outside, have them sit in the car or take them into the restroom. I understand that sometimes there’s no where else to go so in this case you’ll have to learn to ignore the fact that others are watching. I know this can be really difficult especially for first timers but your focus should be trying to calm your child and not worrying about what others think. Don’t worry about getting it right the first time. Good parenting has a lot to do with experience. Dr. Harvey Karp, a renowned pediatrician, is known for his successful techniques in dealing with the challenges of parenting including toddler tantrums. If interested click on: http://www.thehappiestbaby.com/story.html for his take on effective parenting.

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